I met and married my husband Josh in less than a year. We were engaged after five months of dating and were married four months after that.
Sounds crazy, right? Yeah, I would have thought so too except that I intentionally set out to find the man that I wanted to marry within a year.
But before I get into how I did that, a little backstory:
I was never the type of girl who sat around dreaming about her wedding day, envisioning the gown, the ring, the venue, the flowers.
I was more of a guys’ girl, a tomboy. As a kid, I hung out with my older brother and his friends, and that continued as I got older.
For the 15 years I lived in Manhattan, I had a great group of friends but my long term partner in crime was a good-looking finance guy who knew every trick in the book for getting a woman to sleep with him. I saw him date countless women and break all their hearts.
Throughout my 20s, I was happily single and dating tons of men in Manhattan. But all the while, I had the nagging thought in the back of my mind that I had to meet someone by the time I was 30. My brother and his friends frequently talked about how they wouldn’t date a woman over 30, and they brainwashed me into believing that after my 30th birthday, my chances of finding love would be over.
Luckily, they were wrong.
When I hit 30, I actually started having serious relationships. Problem was, I consistently settled for the wrong guys.
See, I thought it was good (great even) to get 80 percent of what I wanted in a man. So what if he wasn’t good looking? He was super smart. Who cares if he had no money and made me pay for everything? He was loving and loyal.
I thought being in a long-term relationship was about making trade-offs. I didn’t believe I could have it all.
After a few years of being in relationships (mostly with guys I didn’t even like!), I found myself single at 34 and on several dating apps and websites.
On the eve of my 35th birthday, I woke up and realized: holy crap, I’m going to have to put 35 on my online dating profile. That was nightmarish for me. Not only was turning 35 a frightening milestone, but it also made me worry that another five years would go by and I’d find myself 40 and alone.
In that moment, I vowed to myself that I would be married within a year but (and this is a BIG but) I wouldn’t settle on anyone who wasn’t 100 percent what I wanted.
After all those years of dating (I had probably had like 75 broken hearts and broke many myself), I finally realized that I was worth it — I deserved to have everything I wanted, and a man wasn’t worthy of my time unless he had all the qualities I was looking for. I would rather be alone than settle.
I knew I had a lot of work to do if I was going to accomplish my goal, but the thought of being alone for another five years spurred me into action.
I started dating like a well-oiled machine and created a system for dating men that ultimately became my signature “Manfunnel” — the number one tool I teach women to help them find and marry the man they’ve always wanted.
We should work together if…
You’re tired of pounding the pavement and never meeting quality guys
Your relationships never work out and you can’t figure out why
You have a successful career and zero time to invest in dating apps (much less actually going on dates!)
You’re happy in other areas of your life — like your career, friends, family — but dating is the one thing that still mystifies you
You live in a difficult market (like a big city or small town) and you find it impossible to meet people
You’ve recently been through a long-term breakup or divorce and you’re looking to get back into dating