Once upon a time, a lonely woman centered her heart and her hopes on a certain man, whom she put on a pedestal. She wondered what he saw in her and why a man of his caliber would be interested in what she had to offer. Long after he let her go, she would obsess and compare other men to him, feel sorry for herself and wonder why a relationship hadn’t yet worked out for her when they had for so many other women. When would it be her turn? Here’s how using a Manfunnel to meet your dream husband in 2018 can happen.
This heartbreaking story was my ongoing pattern. I had gone through so many let-downs while dating in New York City for over a decade. Of course, I had some monumental takeaways. Oftentimes, though, I was already “in” the relationship whole-heartily by the time I figured out it was not the real deal. This left me with painful and long recovery times when I had to grieve and slowly get back on my feet before being ready to face the dating world again. I finally realized that it was not intelligent of me to give my all to these men before I knew their motives. I learned that their true intentions showed up in the first three or four months of dating.
The Manfunnel was born out of simple math and complex self-love. It was built from the same equation that helped me find love quickly and learn how to capture the hearts of much higher-quality men than I had been accustomed to. A Manfunnel is simply a group of men who are looking to pursue you for a relationship; it’s a tool used in what I call “The Abundance Model of Dating.” It means that you hold off from becoming exclusive until you find a man who truly meets your needs on every level and on your timeline.
To follow this advice, remember that a man is not going to date you exclusively if you aren’t meeting his needs. Similarly, you should not allow yourself to be pigeon-holed into a relationship that does not serve your needs. You’re going to have to be really honest with yourself about what you truly want. Additionally, you will have to drop all of the excuses as to why he is not meeting your needs. Ask yourself if you are truly happy. Keep a daily log of how you are feeling and reflect on the relationship. If your relationship is anxiety-ridden, ask yourself why you are accepting this situation.
After you’ve determined that your needs are not being met and that you are ready to have it all and quickly, you are ready to build your Manfunnel. What this means is that, even though you have found someone who excites you, you will continue to keep your options open until you know for sure he is The One. A good rule of thumb is to wait for three months before you delete your other options. During that time, you are learning about men and about what will truly make you happy in a relationship. I call this waiting time “The Exploratory Phase.” This can feel as if you’re taking things extremely slowly; however, it actually saves you years of time.
Having a Manfunnel helps you from becoming overinvested too soon. When we believe there is a lack of options, we may start to slip into a place of scarcity. It’s cyclical: When we start to believe this idea, men read our energy and also begin to believe that you don’t have options. Biologically, this sends a message to men that you are not a high-value mate or a great catch…even if you are!
Here I used my own expert advice
My Manfunnel helped me realize my value in the dating marketplace. I started gaining momentum, and the confidence to date the kind of men I’ve always dreamed of — and, even better, to have these men want to make a commitment with me! When the man who would be my husband showed up, I came across as poised and feminine. You see, I had allowed myself to be filled up by the energies flowing toward me in the dating process, and this energy projected my warm and positive outlook on love. And so, I was able to make a choice with a clear head and an open heart. I set my boundaries on taking things slowly, and he enjoyed every minute of it. When he proposed before our six-month dating anniversary, I knew I had found the right man.
If you are looking to streamline the dating process and avoid having an unnecessary, painful broken heart, it’s time to learn how to Master Your Manfunnel. Doing this can open up a whole new world to you.